tuckin it in

finding yourself in tough situations

can lead to dramatic escapes

maybe just hang in there a bit longer

i hear water dries up..

car won't start

ruh-ruh ruuuughh, titittitititittt..

#!

worst sound ever

its the sound of a car battery dying

the sound of money hitting the floor
hours spent under sickly yellow flourescent autobody shop lightbulbs
beating my head against a dirty brick wall

but worst of all
its the sound of me walking two blocks
to the nearest overpriced liquor store..

it could have happened at a worse time, i suppose
like during my trip to PG next month, or so..

but my favorite part of this breakdown
was all the people i met along the way on my road to repair

went to a Bobby and bought a battery
put it in myself
burned it down in one day..

strandedly, i decided that my issue was probably not so
easily resolved
i then knew, that we would have to throw some more money at it
fortunately, Bobby knew a Ron who had a used part for me and seventy five bucks

i didnt have to order a new unit for five bills
or have the car dragged miles out of town for days..
got it covered for one sixth the price
and put it in where she last stood still

and thats where Gerry comes in

two days, bills, and flashlights, a Bobby, Ron and a Gerry and several high fives later

and i was driving home on my own four wheels again

snow day

well, my town has a snow plough

just for the off chance instance they actually get to use it

last week, i awoke to the sound of one inch
being scraped from the street

i lay in bed thinking

is that a snow plough ?
i wish i had a picture to show everyone

none will believe..

little did i know that this winter, all bets were off..

today my opportunity to capture the beast herself
arrived, and to my surprise
i realized, that in one way or another
i was being paid to play guitar at the party as well

who comes around on a special night ?

40 pounds to freedom

oh boy.

so much rice i have no idea where to keep it all !

but i think i'll be needing it

this all started last winter
when we moved into our first rental together

our first night in town, and lots was going on
so the cupboards were rummaged..

1 of the goods rummaged that night, was this rice..

i remember it well
it came in a 1 pound plastic bag

we found in the import section later for 4 bucks..

good enough price for a common goods store loyalty
right off the hop

the rice was a delight !
it was so good, even the ladies
eventually learned how to cook it

and they cannot cook rice
hate it
love rice, hate to cook it

when i showed up, they were cooking it in the microwave

and i dont believe in those..

they soon agreed that the best way to cook the stuff
was traditionally
i used to think the only reason they kept me around

was for my rice from before !

but lordy, lordy.. you should see me now..

anyways, a few weeks ago
i realized that my 'common goods store'

had not recieved shipment of my brand in awhile

and i kept checkin in on it
no rice
no rice..

so finally, today, in a 1 last, desperation search

i checked the floor, under Our empty shelf

the space where the dirty costco bags lay waste..

just for one last glimps of some scrap of affirmative existance

out of a need for closure.. an empty box, or anything..

and what did i see and buy ?

out of deepest loyalty for brands that i can gather ?

i bought the first 40 pound burlap sack with Our Name on it

enough rice to last till expired

1 year, 9 months, and 9 days away..

1 cup product

1-1/2 tap water

bring mixture to a boil, stir

cover, switch to low, simmer for 10 minutes

take off heat for 5

serve 4 smiles

for extra love boil with

butter and

ginger

all year long

snovember

left my snow shovel up north
but i've still got enough winter jackets

to cause indecision on my way out the door

time to go further south

watery memories

something about bagpipes and poppies seems to draw a crowd

it was a wet afternoon and the whole town showed up

i got shut down..

the party aint much of a party when you have to look over shoulders

he was late too..

spooktaculous !

nice costume.. very creative

these are clothes i used to wear

im going as the old me

my girlfriends boyfriend

I walked into the store

I need some goods
well, what are you looking for?
Im the guy who has yet to buy his girlfriend flowers
well, how long has it been?
well.. a year
well, i never!
hey lady, dont dehumanize me with your flowers, i came here for a good time!

my guess is, the office had an exciting delivery

somebody has the best boyfriend ever

soles perfect storm

My old alligator ship shoes have been stressin me to unrest!

workin in em is way too much..

I figure its all in the pressure point design
its a heel wedge 3/4 to the front

and it makes me feel like throwin up
and my feet were so sore from wearin em, i couldnt even get to sleep

anyways, before work, I went down to the store for inserts

from Dr. Scholl

I stood up on the ol Dr. machine maself

a couple balancing calibrations

stand on this foot, line up the medicine

stand on this foot, you are doing well

I thought I was getting a physical..

then it asks 'are you under 180 lbs?'

the only option on a touch screen is 'yes'

'Dr. Scholl has concluded that for corrrect support you should get the 130's'

right next to the 110's, and 120's, there were no 130's

stocks of every other size as high as 430's

should I go against the doctors wishes, and try the 120's?

or even push my luck and try some 110's?

I bet I could get away with some of those for a while..

but for $50!

I dont think so..

so..

I went two isles over for the slouch variety

$4.44

three pennies away from a tenth the cost aint bad

(after hst, huck thew)

I love em

F U Dr S

the one size fits all suit me fine

Fathers Day Comes Early

i am going to be a dad
sometime mid march 2011

working on my moustache
and dadlike wisdom

i've already spent some time with phrases like "no" and "my, this is lovely weather we're having for this time of year.."

i'm also pretty sure i could take most of the dads on my street..

when my new little friend is born, i'll get him/her a wallet
with at least five pictures of me in it

pictures of me smiling
pictures of me laughing
pictures of me saying "i'm proud of you"
pictures of me building a fence
and pictures of me giving a sturdy handshake whilst engaged in a bout of hearty, yet affirmative, eye contact

one day when (s)he's ready, (s)he'll say, "wanna see some pictures of my dad?"

others will look at those pictures and say, "i wanna meet that dad.."



a few days ago, we went to the hospital to get our first baby picture





when i was granted access to the room
it was like i had entered a darkly lit spaceship



head heavy alien, pokin away at my lady
real time scenes of my unborn child in cross cut 2D display
heart beating
melting into face with hollow eye sockets
a spine
a powerful spine..
scanning along a femur
onto fingers and moving hands
moving hands!
those legs are moving too!
amazing!
heart beating!
135 bpm!

heart beating..

the only document we got to keep was a blurry xerox of the spine, and bean



i am exploding

everyday pretentious

busking with electric guitars
actors who play themselves in movies
french fries

photographers..

Alms for the Poor

The streets are filled with them

and so is my freezer

we're talking pounds of sweet Duncan Black

I got 60 of em

jam till you run out o' cans..

Starfish Soup Sucks

I awoke to the aroma of a character rich signature blend and walked into a cup half full of it while wandering down the hall towards the sounds of early activity.

When we had finished our morning duties, I said goodbye to my family, and stepped out into Mother Nature with her son, and had me a little adventure.




First, we walked out onto an intense scene and imagined it from up close, and then we decided to make that happen.



It was not easy to find any sort of trail which would lead us to the water, so we had to forge down a mountain through all kinds of brush and detours caused by impassible cliff drops.



When we arrived at the shore line, the sun was out, and so was the tide, so we made use of the creatures found within the small pools along the point as bait for our fishing line.



After camp was made, and some salt water was set to distill, Brandon took his line with hook full of rock crab to shore, and cast a hopeful line out into a murky sea.



Moments later, all kinds of commotion was going on near the shore. I crested the hill between camp and sea to find Brandon untangling a starfish from his hook. Apparently, starfish can move pretty well when they are hungry.



When I decided that all our survival efforts had failed, I enticed my traveling companion with the promise of a fresh salmon feast in exchange for accompaniment back up the hill.



Basically, we learned alot of things about nature that day.

First: while sandals are good for many things, hiking down mountains is not one of them.

Second: Fresh water is good.
Third: Starfish soup SUCKS.
Fourth: Salt water is hard to distill.
Fifth: Kraft dinner made from salt water tastes alot like playdough.
Sixth: Don't eat playdough when you're thirsty.
Seventh: While hiking down mountains in sandals is no fun, hiking up them in sandals is even less fun..



And finally, Eigth: When you're lost in the woods, look for coloured ribbons in the trees to guide you.



Even though my front yard was nowhere near as vast as Brandons was, the comforts which followed were well worth the long road home.

Addictions Never Last Long In The Woods

When I told Colin that B.B. would be paying me a visit soon, he knew I wasn't talking about Black Belt Jones, or 'Barbi the party Baboon' or even the fact that Brandon lived a couple thousand miles away didn't stir any thoughts as to the identity of this mysterious double B character.

I picked up the B's at the corner of Louis Lane and Canada Avenue. He had a backpack filled with camping gear, swinging pots, and party clothes. After a quick ‘hey, how ya doin?’ we headed wood-ward to hang out with all of nature for a bit.

Out of town and driving along a river, we found a parking lot well above the water, and located a trail of descent which would lead us down to brook.



While walking along the river bank, we spied a small island feet from shore with the perfect wizard staff on it.



One leap, splash and swim later, and my companions outfit had maxed out its potential for coolest summer getup of the year, IMHO.




Talking with my nomadic friend reminded me of how fragile life is, as a leaf in the breeze.. “addictions never last long in the woods” he said after a brief contemplation following one of his tales. I laughed, and reflected on my own addictions. The ones which I could go without, and the ones which were more comforts than toxics. A job, a car, a home, someone to believe in, and really, just anything to hold onto..



Some of us feel the need to grip at these things, and some of us will find em wherever we go..

Sunset on a Mountain Top

The hike was steep and foggy.
The day was late; and the party.. determined.

"How far to the top?" we asked a passer by -

"You're about halfway" He replied.

Can't stop now - midday sun peeking through the dense forest mist..

Cigarette break..

Walking stick tossed to the side, we trudged on.

I took my leave to scout the summit.

By the time my companions caught up, I was reminded of how short winter days are.. and how the lack of snow deceives even the keen.

The beauty of seeing a sunset from above the clouds, is only overshadowed by the tragic decent in darkness.

Good thing my camera's LCD screen is bright enough to light the way.. or I'd've never found my steppin spots..